Are the Rich getting Richer? Well, no, actually. According to an article on CNN Money by Chris Isidore, the Rich are losing out in this economy, just like the average person, it just happens that comparatively the average person is losing more. The net result is that the gap between the richer and the poorer is widening, but most people’s net worth is going down on the whole. The trend is a frightening one, but it’s important not to ring bells of alarm, or to overreact and pretend that the rich are out there stealing our money. In such times, it’s easy for people to spread, and, more importantly, believe the most obscene rumors.

Still, wealth gaps are scary things. The American Dream is all about overcoming circumstance and obtaining success through your own efforts and preservation. In theory, what fuels our society is the belief that, through hard work and shrewd decisions, that anyone can go from the lowest of low to the highest of high. That the poorest person from the rural back-country can ascend to the top of city life, dining with company executives, attending premieres with the stars, and otherwise engaging in the dream world of the rich and the famous. When there’s a gap in wealth, the task of bridging that gap and making your own success story becomes far more daunting.

The fact of the matter is that the American Dream has been a rough approximation of what it was for quite awhile now. Those who are born poor have a tendency to stay poor and those born rich have a tendency to inherent wealth and stay rich. People born into wealth get better schooling, connections and their circumstances are better prepped to keep them in the success that they were born into. That doesn’t mean that the ambitious and hard working can’t achieve.

Of course, there’s a large disconnect between what some people view as “rich” as opposed to what actually constitutes a “high-life” lifestyle. When people consider themselves rich, they often think of the “super-rich” the kind of rich that we see on the news in scandals all the time. The sort of rich that could buy a town if they wanted to. That kind of rich certainly exists, but it’s a different sort of rich altogether. The baseline of rich is something which is far more subdued. Having the income to live in comfort, to afford a few toys but not go overboard, that sort of rich exists out there. The baseline of rich exudes success as well, you don’t generally get it from inheritance, because there’s often not enough to split among a whole family upon the death of its wealthy head to keep them all wealthy.

While many might consider it desirable to reach the bracket of the “super rich”, let’s ignore that level of wealth in our discussion for now. Instead, I want to look at a far more attainable level of wealth, the basics of being rich. A book published in the mid-90s titled “The Millionaire Next Door” offers a great example of research and statistics on the lifestyle of more “normal” rich people. J.D. Roth wrote a review of the book in 2006 which sums up quite a few of the more interesting statistical points. These “normal” millionaires fell into some intriguing personal-finance categories.

Many Millionaires are Frugal. This is sort of an odd point to think about, especially when the news inundates us with stories of famously rich people going into debt, or essentially living fast-paced, enormous lifestyles that hang on a thread. These “rich” are funneling a lot of potential funds through credit and often recklessly overspending. For ordinary people it can often be difficult to imagine how a person could spend millions of dollars instantly, but their lifestyle demands it. However, this concept, known as “living above your means” is something which afflicts people across all wealth levels along the spectrum. Prudent people can choose, instead, to live at or below their means, which a far more affordable lifestyle which lends itself to lower stress levels, less risk, and more comfort.

Many Millionaires Spend Wisely. This brings up another interesting statistic made in the article, that, at the time, 50% of millionaires owned their own business. Part of operating a successful business is being able to balance a budget, to see where your money is going and where it is coming from. Knowing which assets are liquid and which assets will take time to come into realization. Millionaires in general, business owners or not, tend to manage their own investments, they watch and calculate their spending, income, and anything else relevant to their finances.

Many Millionaires Care More About Stability than Status. This last point sort of breeds the previous two points. A good portion of millionaires, the “quiet” millionaires, use their money wisely to secure their futures and look more toward and focus on maintaining their income rather than their social status. This sort of focus is what seems to be the sort of “key” to bringing about success. Rather than looking towards your material goods as a symbolic representation of your wealth, the “quiet” millionaire knows that they’re wealthy by the comfort they feel in being able to do what they want to do in life without worrying about losing it all due to sudden events.

You might be thinking: Great, but how do I get there? There’s not going to be one easy step to reaching wealth. I’d like to think that most people are reasonably intelligent and that they recognize that “get rich quick” schemes don’t work, and that most books and such that are centered about helping you become rich are actually just full of points which you can find for free elsewhere. That, rather than doing something specific, correctly, financial success is about remembering lots of little things and self-restraint.

The gap between the rich and the poor might be widening, but the opportunity to better one’s self still exists. Personal-finance is made up of self-discipline and practicing simple principles. Rather than be alarmed, scared or angry, people should take in the information impassively, and learn how to use it to their advantage. Opportunity exists for those who wish to take it.